Wednesday, 12 August 2015

5 things you don't expect to happen when you get braces.

I'm a #braceface, but apart from being able to store copious amounts of food in my teeth, like a hamster does with its cheeks (whether I like it or not), there are some unexpected privileges from being a metal-mouth, after all.

1. Your nails are nicer. 

I've always been a nail biter - well, not so much a nail biter as a biter-of-skin-around-nails. As a result, I suffer from flaky and generally unappealing skin around my fingernails. But, when one has braces, one cannot chew one's hands. This little treasure, when coupled with my new near-religious Sunday hand pamper routine (read more about this here) means I've got hands as soft as a baby's arse! Who knew?


2. You almost never have bad breath.

Bad breath is not something I've ever particularly suffered with (or at least, no one has told me!) but since having my brace affixed, I've worried about bad breath - there's simply more for the bacteria that causes bad breath to stick to now, so it's sort of inevitable. But, because I'm a little paranoid, I use mouth wash around 3 times a day, and sometimes brush at lunchtime too. So, I'm minty fresh 24/7!

3. You get a nice pout.

When I first had my braces on, and then a couple of other periods when they'd achieved a significant milestone and moved teeth somewhat forcefully - I've had a lovely pout. Don't get me wrong, it's not all the time, but when swelling means it does happen, it's enough to make you think, "oh, a silver lining," whilst holding back the tears from agonising pain.

4. Your lips are nicer.

Much like my finger chewing peeve, lip biting was a bit of a thing for me. Not (just) in a sensual come-to-bed kinda way, but in a biting chunks of flesh out and then realising what you've done when you can taste blood kinda way. But now that I have braces, that's not a problem!


5. You become more confident when speaking in public.

This is probably something very specific to myself, because I've never been shy when it comes to public speaking. But, when you just have to get over the fact that 9 times out of 10 you're going to accidentally spit on someone and, you know what, there might just be a bit of salad in your braces, you almost reach a new state of enlightenment and just get over stupid nerves and think, "fuck it, I've got braces, and I'm gunna spit on you."

END.