Saturday, 15 February 2014

What Londoners say about Manchester

I love a Londoner, (if the breed truly exists, it seems the capital is actually just full of people from elsewhere in the UK). They're a simple set of creatures, who think the London Evening Standard is a national paper and that the Tube can take you to Torquay. But whilst this is all rather sweet, they can come out with some rather Northern-phobic sound-bites that would make you cry if you weren't internally screaming whilst nodding and saying "Umhumm, yeah."

In my years I've heard a few good one-liners and I've always intended on writing this post, I think it's about time. Oh and thanks to those that contributed to the post via Twitter, their handles are mentioned!

Londoners, on Manchester:
  • "Oh my god, it's like a mini London."
  • "Oh I love Manchester, because it's like a mini London!"
  • "Do you have the tube?"
  • "Will my Oyster card work on the tram?"
  • "Does Wicked play here?"
  • "Do you have theatres/museums/galleries/Starbucks?"
  • "Well, there's nothing like this [generic B2B networking event] in Manchester is there?"
  • "We thought we should come up and host a [generic in-store shopping event], because Manchester doesn't have that usually, does it?"
  • "Oh my god, why doesn't Manchester have a fashion week?"
  • "Do you have Sainsbury's?"
  • "Do you have WiFi, like, in Manchester?"
  • "So, the Northern Quarter is like a smaller Shoreditch?"
  • "So, the Gay Village is like a smaller Soho?"
  • "So, you have a China Town?"
  • "Do those Coronation St houses you live in have electricity?" from @ACETaxisBrixham 

              • "Oh I'm always in Manchester, Blackpool/Bolton/Glasgow is in Manchester, right?"
              • "So, where's Coronation St?"
              • "How far do you live from Coronation St/Emmerdale Farm/Starbucks?"
              • "Does it rain in Manchester, like all the time?" from @missnspence
              • "I didn't think you could get Mangetout in the north" from @ghostyltom 
              • "How do you get your news, your culture?
              • "You say tea, we say dinner." from @SJ_Selina
              • "You're more..... down to earth"
              • "Have you been to the Hacienda?"
              • "Have you been to Coronation Street?"
              • "Ohh, red or blue?"
              • "Do you know Brooke Vincent/Helen Flanagan/Bez?" 
              •  "Oh I bet you love Oasis/The Smiths/The Stone Roses/Take That."
              • "Oh, it's grimm up north, 'eh?, 'eh?"
              • "Do you have an outside toilet?" from @ACETaxisBrixham 
              Any other gems, tweet me @jordanjmcdowell!